April 28, 2010

Two Years Ago

April 28, 2008 - Two years ago today...

My dad took my mom to an Insta-care.
She had been battling a bad cough.
Her doctor had told her it was allergies.
She wasn't getting better and couldn't sleep at night.
My dad called me at 7:15 am and asked if I would go in and work for my mom. (My mom was Aaron's office manager/receptionist.) After chest x-rays, my dad called to tell me they had found several "masses" in her lungs. It was either pneumonia, tuberculosis, or some sort of cancer. They were headed to St. Marks hospital for more tests.

When I heard this, the word "Cancer" didn't register. Instead I told Aaron, "I sure hope it isn't tuberculosis. Can you imagine all the patients we will have to call? That would be a nightmare."

I wish it would have been. I would have called every single patient myself. It wasn't Tuberculosis but it was a nightmare.

This time of year is hard for me.
I hope you will, occasionally, let me vent on this blog.

For those of you who know me, you know:
how close I was to my mom.
how much I depended on my mom.
how much I love talking about my mom.
how much I LOVED my mom.

If you know me, you will also know I remember dates.
My mom remembered phone numbers.
I remember dates.

April 28, 2008 was a terrible day.
If you ask any of my siblings, we can tell you exactly what we were doing on Monday, April 28, 2008. We were all doing different things but feeling the exact same way - ... NUMB. We stared out our windows and watched as life continued for everyone else but stopped for us.

I miss my mom. I miss everything about her.

If you read my blog, especially these next few months, please know that I am not depressed. I am not falling apart. I am not in need of "help". I just miss her and want to talk about her.


Merilee said...

I like hearing about your Mom, so talk away. :) Hope your doing ok though. Thinking of you.

Debbie said...

I do the same thing...remembering where we were when things happened. You called me and I called your Mom. Things began to happen so fast after that.
Life is NOT fair, but you are so blessed to have the siblings you have.

Alyssa said...

Funny how so much has changed since that date two years ago, and yet it is still as fresh in your mind as it was at the time. Just like your memories of your mom, fresh in your mind and a constant companion to you. Talking about your mom is good therapy, so YOU talk and WE will listen......

Shauna said...

Your mom was amazing. It is so touching to read about your experience and how you remember her.