A few weeks ago, I decided that this Mother's Day I wasn't going to dwell on the fact that I didn't have a mom here to celebrate on Mother's Day. Rather then feel sad, I would enjoy the day and be happy. Having set this goal, I have unexpectedly spent the last three days ridding myself of many tears. I am embarrassed to say that I have caught a few friends off-guard with my uncontrollable blubbering. My poor husband has had to patiently wait for me to finish my bawl session, reapply make-up, and dab a swollen and red face, so that we can carry on about our day. But I intend to keep my goal.
Tomorrow, I will wake up happy. I will allow my sweet kids to pamper me with their darling school-made gifts. I will let Aaron figure out dinner. I will smile. And I will enjoy the day, knowing how blessed I am to have three little people call me "Mom." Because I know that being a mom is such a great blessing that not everyone gets to enjoy.
But, it felt strange not to honor my mom on my blog. This blog is my journal. Sometimes it is an "over-share" and sometimes it is a "bragging zone". But it is a place to jot down my feelings, desires, frustrations, and memories. So... on this Mother's Day eve, I want to wish my mom a Happy Mother's Day.
I wish she was still here so I COULD celebrate her. She was my best friend and the greatest example of what a MOTHER really is. Tonight I miss her. Tonight I am sad. But my heart is filled with gratitude. I know how lucky I am. I know how blessed I was. Because for 35 years, I got to call her "Mom".
Happy Mother's Day, Mom!!